Day 177 – 31st March 2010 (Lilongwe, Malawi – Chipata, Zambia)
OK, so today we found ourselves at the centre of a small international incident – as you do. The players – one Malawian policeman, one Zambian policeman, one Malawian thief in disguise as a money changer and two rather angry overlanders from Britain. The scene of the crime – Malwian/Zambian border post at Chipata. The storyline – a rather old one (you would have thought we’d know better by now) but basically it goes like this …
Black market money changer (aka thief) offers us a good rate to change Malawian Kwacha to Zambian Kwacha, we should receive ZKw366,000 but we count only ZKw306,000, thief insists it is ZKw366,000, we argue, accuse him of not being able to count properly and call transaction off. Thief returns our Malawian Kwacha and makes a quick exit back across the border before we can realise he’s skimmed off MKw1,500. OK, so this is only about UK£6 and we spent more on breakfast this morning but it is the principal – we have been lucky enough not to have had anything stolen yet on this trip (so blatantly anyway, odd Egyptian/Ethiopian charging us well over the odds excepted) – and so we stormed back over the border to Malawi seeking justice. Enter Malawian policeman – we explained our predicament. He then walked us back to Zambia, deposited his automatic rifle and bullets in our vehicle (despite a brief attempt by Oli, we decided against shooting up the place for £6) and escorted James to the Zambian policeman. Now, not having that much faith in the African police system, we thought this would be where the story ended but oh no … one by one the other money changers (aka thief’s friends) were hauled in and interrogated whilst James watched on, half expecting one to be dragged around the back for a beating. But, without a hand needing to be raised, one volunteered to pay James back the Mkw1,500 saying he would get it back from the thief later – wonders will never cease! And so, international dispute settled and our faith restored in the African justice system, we entered Zambia.
Miles travelled: 100 miles (total 17,608 miles) Highlight of the day: Causing an international incident over £6.
Comment of the day: James to Malawian policeman “this man is a thief, a bad man, he is
breaking the law” Malawian policeman to James “ah,
but Sir, you are breaking the law changing money on the black market”
… good point, we made a swift exit with our pockets intact!
Days 178 & 179 – 1st & 2nd April 2010 (Chipata – South Luangwa, Zambia)
Despite being April Fools Day and having ample opportunity to give James a mohican, Oli gave James a good shearing with his clippers (you can now call me “Oli Sorbe”)- see pics. We said goodbye to Oli (once again) and headed for South Luangwa National Park in search (once again) of the most elusive of all big cats, the leopard. William seems to have developed a bit of a vibration in recent days, not serious we think and since the National Park was only 80 miles away, we thought we’d still go for it. Unfortunately (you really would have thought we’d have learnt our lesson by now) it was 80 miles on one of the worst roads in Africa. Four (very tedious) hours later of negotiating some deceivingly small puddles that actually masked craters you could probably fit a mini cooper in, we arrived at Flatdogs Camp on the edge of the National Park…. 20 minutes later we were sitting down to cream tea prior to our night drive – pretty cool way to end what otherwise would have been a very bad day! We decided to stay J
Miles travelled: 93 miles
(total 17,701 miles) Highlight of the days: Being driven on a game drive (pure luxury),
sundowners by the lake and returning to the vehicle, turning around and seeing
a hippo making its way to the river about 20 meters away from where we were
camped, luckily we weren’t between it and the water at the time!
Comment of the days: Meeting another Foleys Land Rover being driven
by two UK lawyers on the South Luangwa river (spooky) “we left the UK 18 months ago but got a bit waylaid by managing a
national park in Malawi for 12 months” … as you do Sighting of the days: big male lion at night and a baby elephant practising its mock charging on us
Day 180 – 3rd April 2010 (South Luangwa NP – somewhere half way between Chipata and Lusaka)
The road south along the park towards Lusaka had been closed due to the rains so, reluctantly, we retraced our steps along the same shocker road back to Chipata. Luckily, it had not rained for the last couple of days so the puddles had lost some of their deceptive depth, or maybe we just knew what to expect, either way – it didn’t seem such a nightmare road the second time around. But it did hamper our speed so, as night fell, we found a campsite by the side of the road called Zulu Kraal (did the Zulu’s ever make it to Zambia??). Not the most salubrious campsite of the trip – the long drop toilet was home to some very large spiders and attractively covered in blue lino but hey ho, we whipped up some sweet & sour chicken (Sharwoods finest) and drank the last of the pink wine that had exploded in our fridge … happy days again.
Miles travelled: 201 miles (total 17,902 miles)
Days 181 – 4th April 2010 (Somewhere half way between Chipata and Lusaka - Lusaka)
Starting the day with pancakes always means a good day and although we spent most of the day driving, at the end of the day were our friends, Debbie & Wayne, to welcome us to Lusaka – with a proper real bed, a hot bath (haven’t had such a luxury since Tunisia) and homemade lasagne, awesome!
Miles travelled: 268 miles (total 18,170 miles) Comment of the day: From the tsetse fly border control man to James
“I’m hungry, I want to be fat like you” - he then proceeded to waive a
butterfly net around William and passed us through … could have done with this
guy in the Serengeti
Days 182-184 – 5th–7th April 2010 (Lusaka)
We spent a few days chilling in Lusaka with Debbie & Wayne including a night out at the casino (think there may be a theme developing here with capital cities and casino nights??), although a guy from Zim who had been drinking for 4 days straight was providing far too much entertainment to gamble – the lotus position in the floor was obviously far safer than a bar stool for this African - chicken strips at the Irish pub and a braai at the local crocodile farm surrounded by Labradors but the best bit, catching up with friends, watching TV on the sofa and Joseph washing and ironing all our clothes… priceless.
Miles travelled: 160 miles (total 18,330 miles) Highlight of the days: sleeping in
a real bed J
Comment of the days: Waitress in the Irish bar “we have run out of gas, so we can only fry your halloumi not grill it”
– classic African logic
Day 185 – 8th April 2010 (Lusaka - Livingstone)
Reluctantly we said goodbye to Debbie & Wayne and headed for Livingstone and the famous Vic Falls, via a quick stop at the most impressive Shoprite I have ever seen … it’s all easy from here on down, Yay! Boreworst and two t-bone steaks heavier, we made the long journey to Livingstone – and we would have made it at a reasonable hour apart from 35miles out, in typical African fashion, the road turned sh**e – what was that everyone says about not driving at night in Africa? Doh!
Miles travelled: 337 miles (total 18,667 miles)
Highlight of the day: Arriving in Livingstone in one piece, although James may have lost some patience particles on the sh**e road, to be greeted by our old friend, Oli
Comment of the day: Oli “I think she’s the one”
Tune of the day: Mostly a Killers kind of day
Days 186-189 – 9th – 12th April 2010 (Livingstone)
Livingstone is a place for adrenaline junkies – you can do everything from chucking yourself out of a perfectly good plane over Vic Falls to chucking yourself off a perfectly good bridge. Now, to Ness, such activities just seem a bit stupid (obviously nothing to do with a small case of vertigo and all these activities involve chucking yourself off very high things here) and James has chucked himself out of enough perfectly good planes for the both of us so we just chilled … and met Neil Morrissey! Oh yes pop fans, of Men Behaving Badly and (I didn’t actually know this) Bob the Builder fame – he is now travelling overland for 4 weeks from Dar in Tanzania to Rustenburg in South Africa in two white Foleys Land Rovers with the same spec as William – the man obviously knows how to travel. He is filming something called “Men Behaving Brewery” or “Men Brewing Badly” maybe, didn’t quite catch it but it is about his beer that he brews with a mate, Richard Fox, and they are taking it to the Football World Cup … I didn’t like to say that the World Cup is a bit more than four weeks away …
Miles travelled: 57 miles (total 18,724 miles)
Highlight of the days: Charlie Mouse meeting Neil Morrissey – see pics
Comment of the days: Neil Morrissey “yeh, this is a very good vehicle” Yay! For William and his friends!
Tune of the day: Can we Fix it, Yes we Can by Bob the Builder